Most Needed Skills on a Date Are Not the Sexiest Ones

Some people look for other qualities on a date than just looking sexy. Others prefer seeing another aspect of a person than just their physical appearance.

And sometimes your date has seen it all, so they want to see something more than just that. They want to see beyond what the eyes can. They want something different.

So, let’s find out why sometimes the most beneficial skills or qualities on a date aren’t always the sexiest:

  1. Showing personal interest tells how interested you are. Remember you are with someone, not yourself, so avoid talking about yourself throughout. Take a personal interest in the other person, ask questions, and listen with interest.
  • We deem people who make everything about themselves arrogant and boring. Everyone loves to feel needed and important, so putting in the effort to show your date that they are in high regard and valued may secure you a second date.
  1. Being yourself is beautiful. Faking your identity is the last thing you want to do on a date. Faking to impress is a wrong move many people make. Who doesn’t love someone who is not afraid to be themselves unapologetically?
  • We admire people who aren’t afraid to own up to their strengths and flaws with their heads high. Be yourself, show who you are, and you will find your person.
  • Make the other person on the date feel comfortable to be themselves as well!
  1. Having fun creates a relaxed environment. Going on a date is to get to know each other and have fun. Don’t unnecessarily pressure yourself to be perfect or have a perfect date. Go to enjoy the day and make the best out of it.
  • Avoid focusing on rushing into a relationship. A first date isn’t to decide if you want to marry this person, but hopefully go on another date.
  1. Sincere compliments show attentiveness, not flatter. Both gentlemen and ladies appreciate a genuine compliment, not mere flattery, to gain their attention. Give compliments when relevant or needed, not unnecessary flattery that will make the other feel uncomfortable and cringe.
  • A simple “you look great” or “beautiful” or “handsome” is fine. Still, you might want to compliment something other than their physical appearance, like or their great taste in music, intelligence, or laughter.
  1. Dressing appropriately for the occasion shows how you feel. Dressing appropriately for the occasion shows how important it is to you. Dressing inappropriately can create the impression that you do not care about the date or the person you are meeting.
  • Take the time to ensure that you look your best. Wear clothes that fit well and enhance your natural, good qualities. Be clean, well-groomed, and smile!
  • Think about the setting and dress code of the location—no need to overdress for a coffee date or underdress for a dinner date. Just make sure it is appropriate.

Remember, some skills are admirable but aren’t sexy. So ask yourself, “Will I give those skills or qualities a chance?” Allow yourself to see other qualities, sexy or not, and open doors to beautiful relationships you will cherish.


This concludes our training for today. We invite you to advance your personal development and financial literacy education by subscribing to Holy City’s Battlefield Academy. Get access to resources that will help you elevate your financial IQ, enhance internal / external communication skills, and create a prosperous outlook.

Until next time: God bless, stay positive, and be true to you.

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